Friday, December 23, 2011

Hope.

Story of my life.  I always seem to belly flop on my finals. Bahhhumbug.  It stinks to study and work so hard and still not do as well as you had hoped to.  I'm praying it'll be enough to push me through to get a vet school interview.  But, I'm trying not to hold my breath on this one.  Realistically I'm not feeling terribly optimistic on the whole process.  I'm trying to keep it positive and dwell on the fact I have an awesome graduate school offer set up that is fully funding and will actually help me succeed in vet school.  Plus, it will give me an opportunity to expand my knowledge base and even get some vet school courses out of the way.  Hopefully single life and focusing on school will help me finally get that ever desired 4.0 next semester and even eventual vet school acceptance.

Not giving up yet.  There is always hope.  I'm not cooked til I have the rejection letter in hand.

On a happier note, it's absolutely lovely to be home.  I'm enjoying the large amount of sleep I'm getting and all the shopping I've been doing.  There is nothing nicer then curling up with the two puppies and getting to read a book, FOR FUN.  I love it.  Spending time with my friends and family is great too.  I missed my MD crew something fierce.

It's a beautiful day out, off to go make something of it!  Happy Christmas Eve Eve!

"I'm fallin' into you"

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Finals

Good Lord I can't wait for this week to be over.  At this point I'm just praying I do well.  I feel like I study my butt off and never actually feel fully prepared.

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Who says.

"Keep drinkin' coffee
Stare me down across the table
While I look outside

So many things I'd say if only I were able
But I just keep quiet
And count the cars that pass by

You've got opinions, man
We're all entitled to 'em
But I never asked

So let me thank you for time
And try to not waste any more of mine
Get out of here fast

I hate to break it to you babe
But I'm not drowning
There's no one here to save

Who cares if you disagree
You are not me
Who made you king of anything
So you dare tell me who to be
Who died
And made you king of anything

You sound so innocent
All full of good intent
You swear you know best

But you expect me to
Jump up on board with you
Ride off into your dellusional sunset

I'm not the one who's lost
With no direction oh
But you won't ever see

You're so busy makin' maps
With my name on them in all caps
You got the talkin' down just not the listening

And who cares if you disagree
You are not me
Who made you king of anything
So you dare tell me who to be
Who died
And made you king of anything

All my life
I've tried
To make everybody happy while I
Just hurt
And hide
Waitin' for someone to tell me it's my turn
To decide

Who cares if you disagree
You are not me
Who made you king of anything
So you dare tell me who to be
Who died
And made you king of anything

Who cares if you disagree
You are not me
Who made you king of anything
So you dare tell me who to be
Who died
And made you king of anything

Let me hold your crown, babe"

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Ouch.

I wanted this... but not really.  I don't know what I want out of this situation.  I just hurts and sucks.  I thought maybe over time it would get easier.  But as of right now, its just been getting worse.  I feel like this kinda thing always comes from the people you least expect to hurt you.  I'm guilty too, yes.  I didn't handle every situation with tack and charisma.  I was struggling, it's hard when your entire world is telling you this is not the best thing for you now.  I flipped... it couldn't handle the pressure of upsetting everyone else.  Pathetic, perhaps, honest, definitely. I've come to realize in the end, you are one of the most important things in my life.  It sucks to have you walk away completely like this.  Last week this showed - I would drop everything for you, I was being directly told not too, I ended up ignoring them and doing it anyway, to proceed to be chew out by you... awesome.  I never thought you'd throw it right back in my face.  Maybe this is supposed to be my moment where I "see the light" and know that it was the right move, taking a step back.  I've always heard everyone talk about true colors.  But I most certainly don't feel like these are my true colors.  Or yours either.  Stress always seems to get the best of us.

I'll pray for you is really all I can say.  I hope you'll do the same.

Another rant... it's convenient that no one really reads this, otherwise I feel like I'd need to hold back a tad more.  It's terribly refreshing to have a place to rant.

Paz y bien.

Everyday is filled with beautiful moments, seek them.

Monday, November 28, 2011

Stop and smell the flowers

"cus' I'm on my way to Tennessee, singing Georgia on my mind"

I'm in a good place.  I'm looking forward to my future.  Take time and trust God.  I keep saying that.  I feel like I just need to start letting things go and having a little more faith that things will work themselves out and I only have so much control.

Learning to love my life again.  There is beauty in everyday, sometimes you just have to stop and enjoy it.

"My kind of crazy"

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Lead your life so that...

"avoidance isn't healthy, self-control is healthy" - the wise words of Chelsea

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

True colors

I absolutely LOVE being home with some of my favorite people.  It's so refreshing to be surrounded by people who love you and who you love back.  I wish I had more of these types of people in my life on a daily basis.  It's nice to be around happy people too.  It's amazing how a little positivity can change your outlook on things.

I have so much to be thankful for :)  God bless food, friends, and family!

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Positive

"Behold the turtle.  He makes progress only when he sticks his neck out." - James Conant


"Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you’ll start having positive results."
- William Nelson

I've never considered myself a somber, depressed person.  But right now, it's been a struggle.  I keep trying to convince myself it's a rough patch, but it keeps seeming to get more painful.  I'm so excited it's finally Thanksgiving break.  I hoping going home will give me the renewal I need and completely refresh my mind and spirit.  My lack of inspiration is frustrating me.

Positivity and healthy friendships!  Come on back!  I'm ready for ya :)

Always a personal favorite - Keep it Positive
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Ui_Zp6hskY

Monday, November 14, 2011

Happiness

I need to go home.  Enough.  Exhausted physically, mentally, and especially emotionally.  Time to conquer my fears and take control of my life instead of it controlling me.  Happiness is my decision and completely obtainable.  I just have to seek it for myself!  It's Senior year, it's my turn to make my life the way I want it.


I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.
- E. B. White

Those who won our independence... valued liberty as an end and as a means. They believed liberty to be the secret of happiness and courage to be the secret of liberty.
- Louis D. Brandeis

As I go through all kinds of feelings and experiences in my journey through life -- delight, surprise, chagrin, dismay -- I hold this question as a guiding light: "What do I really need right now to be happy?" What I come to over and over again is that only qualities as vast and deep as love, connection and kindness will really make me happy in any sort of enduring way.
- Sharon Salzberg


What is the meaning of life? To be happy and useful.
- Tenzin Gyatso, 14th Dalai Lama

It doesn't matter how long we may have been stuck in a sense of our limitations. If we go into a darkened room and turn on the light, it doesn't matter if the room has been dark for a day, a week, or ten thousand years -- we turn on the light and it is illuminated. Once we control our capacity for love and happiness, the light has been turned on.
- Sharon Salzberg

No one is in control of your happiness but you; therefore, you have the power to change anything about yourself or your life that you want to change.
- Barbara de Angelis

Moderation. Small helpings. Sample a little bit of everything. These are the secrets of happiness and good health.
- Julia Child



Sunday, November 13, 2011

Get a grip! Now hold on tight...

Officially lost it.  I need a breather.  Puerto Rico winter break, where are you?!

Friday, November 11, 2011

Grad School? Check!

Well, my backup plan is set!  Last week I was officially accepted to the Virginia Tech Biomedical and Veterinary Science Graduate Program.  So if I don't get into vet school this year, grad school is a go!  Woohooo.  I'm still keeping my fingers crossed though ;)

"Keep calm and carry on"

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

A tad overwhelmed

Gahhhh!  Feeling smothered!  Need some room to breathe.  I feel like the walls academically and socially are closing in on me.  I need to bust free of all of this or I'm gonna lose it.

Asap.

"All I want is peace, love, and a chocolate bar bigger than my head"

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

What now?

I say that like it's an honest question... but when I hold my to do list up it reads all the way to the floor.  I'm just in this weird slump now that my vet school application is in.  I feel like I was SO focused on it for so long it's hard to get back in the swing of things!  Next project.  Applying to Grad School.  Yikes.  I need to really get that application completed by the first week of November as well.  WOOOO.  Nothing like a nice long breather eh? ; )

Off to go battle with Verizon to fix my Internet bill and study some Parasitology.  Typical life of a college student.

Keep calm and carry on.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Dramatic

Why do some people have to take something that doesn't have to be that big of a deal and make it the end of the world?  I'll never understand it.  The worst part is I feel like they're hurting themselves more then anything.  It's sad...  I'm working on being a better person myself now to avoid these types of situations all together.

"single doesn't mean I'm looking for somebody"

But it's funny the support you can find in some old relationships.  Time heals all and somethings I think even reveal fresh starts.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

AHHHH!

I did it!  It's finally finished.  My VMRCVM supplemental is submitted and I finally hit submit this morning for VMCAS.  Too crazy and so exciting.  Now I just sit here and pray for awhile.

Monday, August 29, 2011

New year! Senior? Say whaa?

Third year senior!  Crazy.  I'm excited for everything this year and can't wait to get in the swing of things.

Not to mention, I'm looking forward to all the pre-vet club craziness.  Already love these beautiful young ladies:


Time for A's and an awesome time.  Bring it on Senior Year. <3

Delusional Rant of Nonsense

For the record.  Love doesn't exist.  I mean that in the best way possible.  Types of love exist, yes.  Fairy tail, notebook-esque love?  Complete made up crap.

I decided I'm embracing new things in my life.  New hobbies, new LOVES.

I want to be passionate, but in my own way.  Not necessarily in the way the world perceives passion.  I want to have a love and zest for life.  That's my new objective.

I want to have a passion for Veterinary Medicine, an excitement for the future, and a LOVE for my 13 pound terrier.

This is my time, and I'm taking it.

New day, new start, new me.

Lets do it.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Quote of the day...

One of my friend's statuses

‎"I drink coffee like ill win something when I get to the bottom of the cup."

brilliant <3 and so true.

Sunday, July 31, 2011

The countdown begins

Two weeks and counting until summer school is over! wooohooooo!

Can't wait.

Thursday, July 21, 2011

A day in the life...

Proud to say I was the last person to leave the lab today.  Too bad I don't get overtime because I'd be making BANK.  I definitely underestimated how long it would take me to weigh 180 mice.  I was thinking "yea, I mean that's a lot, probably at least 2 hours."  4.5 hours later I decided I had no idea what I was talking about.  Hopefully all the hard work will pay off.  Until then, I'll keep muddling through.

Plowing through my to-do list!  Can't wait to go home this weekend.  I miss Annapolis and my besties, not to mention my family.

Bringin' Sexy Back:

The hair net is a special fashion statement if I do say so myself.



Got a little dirty.  Best part of working in an awesome lab?  They provide you scrubs and wash them for you so you have clean ones every time you go in :)


"wishin' I was knee deep in the water somewhere"

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Busy Day!

Pooped.  Yup, that pretty much describes it.

Physics lecture then research all afternoon.  Today I worked on RNA extraction from some cells.  Took me awhile but I'm proud to say I didn't mess it up!  You would think that having a set protocol to follow would be dummy proof.  But I'm a pro at messing up mind numbing-ly simple things.

Off to dooo
- 3 Human Sexuality Exams
- 1 Human Sexuality Paper
- 20 online Master Physics Problems
- 10 written book work physics problems
- and comment on the online Human Sexuality forum on scholar

Yea.  This summer blows.

August 12th can't come soon enough!

Perseverance is the hard work you do after you get tired of doing the hard work you already did.  ~Newt Gingrich


^ Yup.


My motivation: happens to have 4 paws and fur -
what-a-bum <3

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Procrastination

I seriously have the most amazing ability to waste the entire evening without even noticing it until it's almost 10pm.  It's a gift.  Motivation = 0, Procrastination=1

... better luck next time.


"If you want to make an easy job seem mighty hard, just keep putting off doing it." ~Olin Miller




^ couldn't of said it better myself

GRE

Welp, finally took my GRE on Saturday.  Ian was wonderful and took me running beforehand and made me breakfast.  He's pretty much the best.  But what a stressful experience.  Makes the SAT look tame.  They take a metal detector wand (like the ones you see in COPs) and practically pat you down before you go into the testing room.  I felt like I was getting arrested rather then going to take a standardized test!  I ended up doing so-so.  My verbal score was pretty high but unfortunately my math score was a lot lower then I hoped it would be.  Oh well, it happens,  I'll just have to kick butt on it if I need to take it again in the spring.  On a brighter note I did well enough that I should be able to get into VT grad school no problem! Woohoooo.  At least my plan B is looking a little safer now.

I'm far from giving up on applying to Vet School this year though.  I'm planning on asking my LORs writers this week (wish me luck!) and hopefully trying to get those in before school starts.  One less thing on the to-do list.

I started my Ovarian Cancer research position last week.  So far so good.  Its been a lot of fun and I'm learning a ton.  I really enjoy the other people in the lab, they're all extremely friendly.  If everything works out I'm hoping to get to continue with this research for my Master's degree *fingers crossed*.  One of my jobs is to literally shove mice in tubes and get their BMIs.  Needless to say they're not fans of the whole process.

Hopefully this next week will get a little less stressful.  I'm looking forward to going home for the weekend for Stephanie Kreiner's Wedding!!!  Not to mention I get to see three of my favorites Melissa Kreiner, Rom Mascetti, and Ian Newell :)  Let the fun begin.

Never Give Up On Your Dreams.

The history of the world is full of men who rose to leadership, by sheer force of self-confidence, bravery and tenacity.” - Mahatma Gandhi

Monday, July 4, 2011

Starting the Vet School Application Process

Whoa.  So crazy that this is getting real!  I opened my VMCAS application last month but starting seriously looking at it and doing research today.

I've never wanted something so badly.  I am going to vet school, no matter how long it takes me.

I'm working to pull up my GPA and I'm planning on kicking butt on my GRE's in a few weeks.  It's gonna be a crazy ride.

I also just stumbled upon an awesome temporary plan B backup plan!  Since I have enough credits to graduate in the spring, I'm thinking about doing a duel degree option where I'd take my senior year of undergrad and work on a masters degree.  Hellooo masters :)


http://www.vetmed.vt.edu/acad/grad/gradhb/gradhb.pdf
page 9 *** duel degree option, oh yeaaa graduate in 4 years with a masters degree



But I'm hoping to get in this year, which would save me from having to worry about this all together.  *Fingers crossed*  Bring it on Summer Session II!


If having a soul means being able to feel love and loyalty and gratitude, then animals are better off than a lot of humans” - James Herriot

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Too cute

Lily is loosing her puppy teeth!  Too cute.  She looks like a little hillbilly with her front teeth missing.

<3 Enjoy the sunshine

Monday, June 27, 2011

Good Weekend

Finally settled in the house!  Thank goodness.  Pictures coming soon :)

I was so glad I got to spend time with Ian and my Mom.  We wouldn't have been able to move without her help (and the help of the boys of 1451 J).

Thanks guys.  I love it here!

Lily loves it too!

Friday, June 17, 2011

Done!

So excited, finally free from the physics exam now off to Galax to see the bestie.  It's Cougar's (momma Webb's) birthday so it should be a good night ;]  Getting monster and I packed up and then we're on the road!



She was excited for the trip too.



The little monster needed a bath before she could be seen in public.  She didn't appreciate being photographed during this traumatic time in her life.

Enjoy the sunshine!


Thursday, June 16, 2011

Physics, Physics is no fun

I have a big physics exam tomorrow and to replace our lowest homework grade we can write a poem on physics.

My thoughts:
"physics, physics is no fun
physics, physics hated by everyone

physics oh physics why do you anger me so
physics oh physics how is there so much to know?"

Yea... I don't think my professor will dig it either.  I'm leaning toward an acrostic at this point.  Keepin' it classy.

Go time.


Smile!  You're cute :)

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

The Start of Something New

I've never been a blogger before, but hey, better late then never.

Summer session at Virginia Tech has been a crazy ride with some little unexpected twists and turns.  But, I'm glad to be keeping busy and bonding with my little nugget Lily.  Shes been great company and I can't imagine being here without her.  Nothing better then waking up to puppy cuddles or having someone SUPER excited to see you when you come home.  She makes me smile.

Now that my first research study has come to an end for the semester life has gotten a little more manageable.  But I have to admit I miss the horses from the equine digestibility study.  They were a lot of fun to work with and I've missed my pony bonding time.

Now I'm mostly just focusing on classes and my Kaplan GRE course.  But between physics lecture, physics lab and microbiology lab I've been busy.  Hopefully it'll make next year a lot more manageable though.  The craziest thing is that I now am honestly on track to graduate in 3 years!  Awesome.  Hopefully it'll be my lucky year and I'll be able to get into vet school this go around as well.  Just need to get A's and an epic GRE score.  Hellooo studying :)

I'm looking forward to the rest of the summer.  The weather here is beautiful and there is nothing better then floating down the New River in a tube on a sunny day.  I can't wait to move into the new house and I'm looking forward to starting my cancer research internship!

I'll keep ya posted.  Enjoy the warm weather and sunshine and compliment a stranger today.

<3